The Circle of Love

The circle of love. It starts with love. It ends with love.

Lately I have been thinking about love, what it really takes to get the love that you’ve always craved.

To be loved is to be seen, to be known.

In order to be seen and known, you have to be vulnerable.

But in order to be vulnerable, you have to love yourself first.

My guess is that, if you are reading this, it’s because you already love yourself deep down. Your curiosity alone is proof. Your curiosity is that inner voice, looking for a way out.

The first step is recognizing that deep inner longing. That craving for the life that you have always known you wanted. Did you ever consider that simply knowing that you deserve better, is actually self love? I believe everyone has that intuition that they are lovable. That’s why it hurts so bad when you don’t get the love you need. We are all meant to be loved perfectly. We are inherently worthy of that, and it is not our fault if we don’t get it.

Unfortunately many of us don’t get the full expression of that love we deserve, so we convince ourselves that maybe our expectations were too high. Maybe that feeling was too optimistic, maybe we just need to put that to the side and keep it pushing. A gentle reminder, that is a lie..

That voice of knowing you deserve better is something to absolutely cherish, because that is the truth. Once you hear that voice, however small it may be at first, once you acknowledge it, that is the beginning of your journey. Maybe that voice has always been there, but the moment that you decide it’s time to act on it, is when your journey officially begins.

The second step on the self love journey ~ learn to treat yourself better than anyone has ever treated you. The relationship with yourself is the foundation for everything.

Imagine coming home from the absolute worst day, and being met with compassion, unconditional love, and radical acceptance?

That kind of treatment is like coming home to a warm hug and a soft bed at the end of a long day.

What if I told you that you can achieve that starting right now?

Don’t get me wrong, it can take time to build that kind of quality relationship with yourself. But if you start today, you are on your way to achieving that.

Every. single. word. that you utter to yourself matters. Your body feels the impact of harsh words towards yourself. Maybe not quite in the same way it feels it when it is said by another person. But if you are speaking harshly to yourself daily for years, the impact will be much greater. Let your words be gentle. Let them be kind.

Every day we have countless opportunities to begin to treat ourselves better through the decisions we make. A thousand little decisions that can eventually result in meaningful change. And the best place to start is with your self-talk. You don’t need to put on gym shoes, pay any money, or go anywhere. Even if you feel stuck and can’t get out of bed, you can still get started with this step.

How do I know this? Because I’ve lived it. I used to be a person with very little self love. I thought that I was different, that I didn’t deserve what other people did. And I would berate myself for it daily. But I now know that there is no human being that deserves love more or less than another. And contrary to what I believed when I was younger, that does include me. And it absolutely includes you, too.

As a young person, something within me knew that little in life would really be worth it until I finally found love for myself. So I worked very hard at it. I put myself out there and failed numerous times. But I finally found angels in the form of good friends, therapists, mentors along the way that reflected my worth back to me and made it easier to believe that I was in fact lovable.

I also began to feel the impact of my own self compassion. I felt liberated, empowered to take chances. For the first time in my life, I felt brave enough to take action on the things that had always scared me.

I found that through vulnerability and showing up in the world, authentically as myself, I actually got more love than I had ever received before.

This is what I mean when I say that love comes full circle.

It starts with you loving yourself, and putting that love out into the world. It will always eventually find its way back to you

The decision to prioritize finding self love was the best decision I have ever made. Because as you will see, once you feel worthy, your relationships will improve. Your career will improve, your finances will improve. You will take better care of yourself than you ever have, simply because you know you are worthy of your best life. You will feel the impact of it, and the world around you will also feel the impact of it.

The world needs you more than ever. The authentic you.

And I want more than anything to convince you that you are worthy, too. So if you are reading this, and you’re not convinced yet, please stay tuned. Because I’m not done trying to convince you. Check out my social media, where I will be sharing my personal stories, and giving examples of what this journey has actually looked like for me. And check back for more blog posts. My writing has been hiding for years, on pages in journals stacked in my closet. But through the power of love, it found its way onto these pages (More proof that this healing stuff actually works).

So happy you’re here. Thank you for reading <3